They call those phantom symptomes
I woke up at about 4:00am and couldn't go back to sleep, so I thought I would go ahead and do my pregnancy tests since hubby was awake (he works nights). I actually dipped 3 tests...One of them a digital because I knew that no matter what the result, I would need a digital to tell me. "Not Pregnant" is what it said..the other two tests only had one line. BFN (big fat negative) for me. I told hubby and we talked at length about our next step. His preference would be to do the meds with trigger shot but not do the IUI this next cycle, just do timed intercourse. We bought a package of 3 IUIs so he doesn't want to "waste" an IUI cycle if my body isn't used to the medication yet. I explained to him that for the last 14 months I thought we were "trying" but it was fake because I wasn't ovulating. It is really really really hard to get pregnant when you don't make eggs. So, now that we are truly"trying" with the help of medication, I want to keep the momentum going with the IUI and keep to it.
But, I thought about it a little more, and with work being really busy and many co-workers going on vacation at the end of May, I may not be able to get off of work if the IUI lands on a day that I work. So, maybe we will do Femara+Trigger+TI(timed intercourse) next cycle.
I called my RE's nurse and told her about my BFN and she was very empathetic. I told her that my period had not come yet so she said that it may take up to 7 days to come. she said that if it doesn't come by Friday then to take another Pregnancy test, if that is negative and my period doesn't come by next Monday then to call her back. I have a feeling AF is coming soon though.
How am I feeling: I was really upset this morning, especially when hubby suggested taking a break on IUI...although he may now get his wish. Hubby was disappointed as well. He was even researching vitamins on GMC.com that are supposed to help with sperm count. So, he has been doing some research. I did make sure to remind him that he is not the problem, it is me. I don't make eggs, this first IUI was just an experiment to see how my body reacts to meds.
The worst part has got be having to tell my family and friends that it was negative, it's like I am really sad that it's negative, but I am also disappointing people around me as well. I know they don't think of it that way but I can't help but have my mind go there when I am feeling so sad.
I'll be ok, just ready to get the show on the road again!
I am feeling Eeyore like today though
I'm so sorry Sarah :( But I have faith that everything is going to work out for you. Remember, God has a plan and everything happens for a reason.
ReplyDeleteAnd hopefully this whole experience is bringing you and Richard even closer together. You are such a sweet couple and I am glad you have someone who is so supportive of you.
I'm sorry about the BFN. I hope you can get to a place where you don't feel that you're disappointing your friends and family. IF is hard enough just dealing with your own emotions nevermind worrying about others' as well! I am sure they all love you and are just hoping for the best for you.
ReplyDeleteAnd I am right there with you on the "fake" trying during all the months with no O. You are in good company! I saw your post on 3TC about getting the right combo of meds - I hope you and your dr. can figure that out for the next cycle. T&P for you!!